WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a bold move that has left political analysts on edge, Vice President Kamala Harris has reportedly ordered helicopters to be dispatched to parent the nation, with promises to keep a watchful eye on everyone.
“It’s time we take parenting to the next level,” Harris declared during a press conference, flanked by a squadron of helicopter pilots and a perplexed Secret Service detail. “With these helicopters, we’ll be able to hover over the nation and make sure everyone is staying out of trouble.”
“We’re not just watching from above — we’re helicoptering in to make sure everyone is following the rules,” Harris explained.