Chief Safety Officer Suggests Adding Better Locks on Doors to US Capitol Buildings
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a less than surprising turn of events, chief safety officer Oscar Lockheed made the suggestion, “Hey,…
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Man Gains New Philosophy on Life After Recent Trip, ‘We Live in a Fear-Based Society’
ALMOND, NY — After an experience that he said changed his outlook on life and reality, Charles Smithfield who just…
Uneasy Woman Still Waiting for Someone to Pop Out of Nowhere This Friday The 13th
CLEVELAND, OH — In an astonishing display of unwavering anticipation, local woman Carol Hapless has spent the entire day anxiously…
Old Hippie Displays Giant Peace Sign on Home to Send Message
OLYMPIA, WA — In a quiet suburban neighborhood, an aging flower child has taken a bold step to make a…
Bought Hiker Reaches Top of Mountain With Sponsored Super Pack
ROCKY MOUNTAINS — In a groundbreaking ascent, local outdoor enthusiast Mark Summit reached the peak of Mount Ego with the…
Local Dad Shares Plans for Lavish Underground Bunker to Win Over Family
LITTLETOWN, MN — In an attempt to secure his position as the undisputed “World’s Best Dad,” suburban father-of-two, Dave Shields,…
