Biden Endorses Idea That All Americans Suck Equally
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a groundbreaking address to the nation, President Joe Biden shocked both Democrats and Republicans alike by…
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California Finds New Use for Waste, ‘We’re Going to Drink It and Bathe in It’
SAN FRANCISCO, CA — In a groundbreaking move aimed at addressing the state’s persistent water scarcity issues, California officials have…
Sen. Marsha Blackburn Knows Special Place Where Some Are Destined to Go
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprising revelation today, Senator Marsha Blackburn proudly declared that she has unearthed a secret locale…
Sen. Rand Paul to Kickoff ‘Airing of Grievances’ With Festivus Report
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprising departure from traditional year-end reports, Senator Rand Paul has announced his intention to kick…
Battleship Boardgame Found at Oval Office Desk
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an astonishing turn of events that has left the nation perplexed, sources confirmed today that a…
Biden Unveils Bold New Cybersecurity Plan: ‘Just Tell the Hackers to Stop, Please’
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a stunning revelation that sent shockwaves through the cybersecurity community, President Joe Biden announced a groundbreaking…
Al Gore Claims Freedom of Speech Not Purpose of His Famous Invention The Internet
In a shocking turn of events, former Vice President Al Gore made a startling announcement, insisting that the freedom of…